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A Conversation with Dr. Michele Borba about Thrivers

A Conversation with Dr. Michele Borba about Thrivers

In her new book Thrivers, Dr. Michele Borba helps parents and educators teach the essential character strengths kids need to become young people who flourish in a rapidly changing, digitally-driven, and uncertain world. As a teacher, educational consultant, and parent for 40 years, Dr. Borba has never been more worried for young people than she is about this current generation of kids. Across the nation, student mental health is plummeting, depression rates among teens are rising, kids are reporting severe anxiety at ever-younger ages. When Dr. Borba asks a group of students to “tell me about your generation,” most respond with stories of stress, anxiety, isolation, and fear. But some young people aren’t struggling; they’re thriving. They cope with adversity, develop healthy relationships, and embrace change. They are ready for whatever the world throws at them, even in uncertain times. Dr. Borba calls these kids Thrivers, and the more she studied them, she wondered, What is their secret? And can it be taught to others? Seven Essential Character Strengths For her book, Dr. Borba combed scientific studies on resilience, spoke to dozens of researchers and experts in the field, and interviewed more than 100 young people from all walks of life. In the end she found something surprising: The difference between those who struggle and those who succeed comes down not to grades or test scores, but to seven essential character strengths that set Thrivers apart (and set them up for happiness and greater accomplishment later in life): Self-confidence: Healthy identify, using personal strengths to …

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routine and creativity

Nurture Your Girl’s Creativity With a Daily Routine

When it comes to your girls’ creativity and development, some routines hinder, and some routines help. Routine basics, done regularly and with love, work. But over-scheduling organized enrichment activities could actually do more harm than good. Just because you can offer your child every artistic, physical, and social extra-curricular activity doesn’t mean you should. Things like enough sleep and nutritious food can seem rudimentary (even banal), but that doesn’t mean they should be taken for granted. Creativity needs both breathing room and structure. Understanding what a balance of each looks like is the difference between “looking like you’re parenting” and actually doing the rather unceremonious things that work. Connection Between Creativity and Routine If you can build a solid foundation of routine for your girl, everything else naturally falls into place. Daily routine fosters the same qualities that creativity requires: Safety and security Confidence and independence A container that encourages a flow state Healthy habits Consider Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, one of the best-known theories of motivation and often displayed as a pyramid. Your child needs you to cover the basics at the very bottom of her pyramid (physiological). If you do this, you’re gifting her with the confident structure required to succeed and space/support to move up her pyramid (safety, love/belonging, esteem, self-actualization). In other words, your girl needs you to hold down the fort with basic daily care routines. It’s deceptively simple. The Four Daily Care Routine Pillars  Sleep “Sleep is the Swiss Army knife of health” – Matthew Walker, scientist and author …

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girls support women

Teaching Girls to Empower Women

One of the most valuable things we can teach young girls is how to empower other women. It’s essential to show kids that they can use their voices to help others and build female camaraderie. Teaching empowerment skills helps girls develop stronger relationships with important women in their lives and encourages them to take significant steps towards gender equality for all. Here are six ways to help girls lift up women of all ages and backgrounds. Teaching Girls to Empower Women 1) Identify Leadership Qualities in the Women Around You Nurturing ambition and celebrating leadership skills are so crucial for young girls. We need to show them empathy, communication, cleverness, positivity, and creativity all have value. Identify these traits in admirable women around them. Here is a simple yet powerful activity to do with your girl. Use this worksheet to identify great leadership skills in women you know. Help your little ones fill out this sheet, and then discuss who you chose for each quality and why. 2) Practice Active Listening We need to listen to women’s voices and show them their opinions matter. To help girls practice active listening: Explain the why behind it. Show them that sincere listening makes people feel valued and appreciated. Practice giving your full attention, not interrupting, asking questions, and responding with no judgment. Actively listening will encourage the same respectful behavior from others. 3) Give Genuine Compliments Another way to encourage girls to empower women is to enable them to complement with sincerity. Kind remarks on appearances are …

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children and boredom

What to Do When Your Girl Says She’s Bored

For young April, weekends were sometimes TOO peaceful. Peaceful looked like dad watching the game alone in the TV room. Sister cordoned off in her bedroom with a new book. Mom gardening. Her boredom meant one of two things: Routine is killing my imagination, but I am too young to articulate this. I am so lonely, but I think everyone feels like this and I don’t know how to reach out. Consider your own adult boredom and you’ll probably find yourself agreeing with the above. Sure, our themes mature into career paths, romantic engagements, and the meaning of a connected life but the bedrock is the same: We’re unfulfilled in some way We’re understimulated or require new stimulation We have nothing to look forward to We’re disconnected from ourselves because we’re not engaging our personal passions or vice versa Within the context of helping your child when she’s been slumped on the couch for hours and sighs, “Mom, I’m bored”, some detective work is required. Now, it is true that fixing your child’s boredom is not your solo responsibility (ultimately, they must self-lead). However, it does require the intellect and wisdom of a parent to decipher what’s going on beneath the “I’m bored”. If your child knew, their whines would be far more specific. Your own lived experience tells you that your child will face boredom many times throughout her life. Don’t underestimate the value of teaching her what lies beneath boredom, and how to move through it. It’s a life-skill that holds its weight …

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True Creativity: What Is It And Five Ways To Nurture Creativity In Your Kids

True Creativity: What Is It And Five Ways To Nurture Creativity In Your Kids

The results of a Google image search for the term “creative person” are very colorful. Literally. There are brightly-dressed people holding paintbrushes and pens. There are rainbows of color bursting from heads, chests, and sketches of brains. One could say the overall results are “arty”. But when did the universe-encompassing noun, adjective, and verb: “creative” become synonymous with the word “art”? By definition, creativity involves the act of making something. An act of creation. Art is far from the only thing humans make, but I bet you’ve never thought of Marie Curie as a creative. Have you ever flicked a light switch and contemplated the phenomenal creativity that birthed electricity? Or is that rather “too sciency” in your mind? Consider Einstein then. You’re probably thinking intelligence, genius, inventor. Maybe E = mc2 or wild white hair. Why aren’t you including this physicist’s extraordinary levels of creative thinking, discovery, and action? Nurture Creativity: Thinking Inside The Box “She’s a creative.” Depending on your upbringing, this statement has the potential to make you nervous or envious. Nervous because society has confused creativity with inner turmoil, unstable lives, poverty, a penchant for whimsy, and, at best, a substance-fulled-but-soulless-but-successful career in advertising. Envious because of the permission given. Creative women can be wild and free. They can wear bright clothes, have bold ideas, and are able to deeply express those ideas at will because “art”. These concepts are misguided and harmful. They hold us back personally. Worse, they cause us to handicap, restrict and misperceive our children because: This …

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Girls That Create Store

Girls That Create Has A Store, Shop Now

We’re so excited to announce the launch of the Girls That Create (GTC) store. You can find the storefront here. Created by talented graphic designer Laura Castillo, the shop features apparel, stickers, magnets, posters, and home/office goods. The items you see in our store today are just the beginning. We’ll be adding more, and we’d love to hear about the merchandise you’d like to see. Click here to submit your ideas and provide feedback. Become a Girls That Create Patron Looking for other ways to support GTC? Consider becoming a GTC Patron on Patreon. As the brand works day-in and day-out to support creative girls and their families, GTC is raising funds for the platform and its mission throughout 2021. All funds raised through Patreon will be used to increase the free resources, items, and creative support available to families. Specifically, GTC wants to PAY women freelances who contribute to the platform. This will also allow more diversity regarding the content GTC delivers. Patreon is a site that enables YOU to provide GTC with ongoing, reliable monetary support. People who can afford to contribute make it possible for GTC to remain FREE and be available for those who can’t. Bonus, you get some awesome stuff too. The GTC Patreon includes five tiers: a $6 per month package a $12 per month package, a $24 per month package, a $48 per month package, and a $96 per month package. Each package includes features like newsletters, monthly printables, surprise gifts special contests, and the list goes on. If …

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positive power of play

The Positive Power Of Playing Into Your Child’s Imagination

Across the garden, on the other side of my neighborly wall, I can hear a young girl playing. There’s a lot of emphatic counting down, the odd shriek and wild splashing, despite the chilly and overcast weather. Would you believe me if I told you she’s currently undertaking multiple, self-induced practical learning experiences that involves leadership, imagination, resilience, problem-solving, debate, and self-advocacy? I can prove it with one quote: “Hey, boys! I’m going to go first this time. You follow me but be quick, the dragon is coming! Okay… 5,4,3,2,1.” Splash. Silence. Thud. “Ouch! My knee. But I’m good… Okay, Jesse also wants to play with us so we need a new game. Mom! Moooom, I’m cold now. I need a towel.” Compare this scenario to three kids lined up silently at swimming school, diving in when the teacher commands and getting out when the whistle blows. “One of the biggest problems with play is that adults tend to hijack it and tend to try and control play. Children are really the best judge of their own play.” – Irene Gunning, CEO, Early Childhood Ireland There are a few reasons for this: Contemporary society and schooling are running a performance-based agenda that’s leading parents to believe that rather than have two children under five playing around the house, they should be grooming tiny adults. Grown-ups are painfully adept at linear, time-based, goal-orientated tasks based firmly in reality. We’re practical. We want to efficiently nurture our five-year-old straight into that Harvard AI program, if it’s the …

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Self-Care is Not About Improving Yourself

Self-Care is Not About Improving Yourself

Renée Trudeau is the award-winning author of Nurturing the Soul of Your Family and The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal. A sought after life balance coach/speaker, her work has appeared in The New York Times, Good Housekeeping, US News & World Report, Spirituality & Health and more. Trudeau graciously agreed to share the following guest post with Girls That Create. As we begin a new year and set resolutions, Trudeau wants you to remember self-care is not about improving yourself.  Self-Care is Not About Improving Yourself One Sunday morning I was lying in bed reading from author Anne Lamott’s beautiful little book Small Victories. In one of her stories about parenting, she shares with a little self-deprecation, but mostly tenderness, how she doesn’t bake for PTA fund raisers, is often disorganized and sometimes forgets to follow-through on updates from her son’s school. Her ability to accept who she is is both endearing and freeing. Her story got me thinking how so many people I meet have a misguided sense about the concept of self-care. I often hear a lot of “shoulds,” and many confess they downright suck at self-care. A a life balance coach/teacher, I have studied, explored, written books about and taught self-care to men and women globally for more than 20 years. I can wholeheartedly share that self-care–a practice that has changed my life more than any other– is NOT about: fixing yourself or turning yourself into a “makeover version” of you trying to become someone who “has it all together” or who’s always …

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10 More Christmas Songs Where Women Rock It

10 More Christmas Songs Where Women Rock It

Whether you love it or hate it, Christmas music is here again. Readers loved the last Girls That Create post on holiday songs by women, so here are 10 more for your playlist. Once again we’ve thrown in some soul, rock and other numbers with all the feels (Spotify link below). Enjoy and Happy Holidays! 10 More Christmas Songs Where Women Rock It 1) Christmas, Baby Please Come Home:  Darlene Love If you’ve seen the 2013 documentary 20 Feet from Stardom, you’ll recall Darlene Love (if you haven’t seen it, please do, the film won the Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature at the 86th Academy Awards). Love grew up listening to gospel music and began singing in her church choir at age 10. She is also an actress. For years Love brought the house down on the Late Show with David Letterman singing Christmas, Baby Please Come Home. 2) Winter Wonderland: Eurythmics British pop duo Eurythmics gifted us this beautiful version of Winter Wonderland. Member Annie Lennox’s vocal range is contralto. She has earned the distinction of “most successful female British artist in UK music history”. Enjoy Lennox’s talents. 3) Joy: Tracey Thorn Tracey Thorn began her musical career in the punk-pop hybrid group Stern Bops playing guitar and providing some vocal backing. She is best known as being one half of the duo Everything but the Girl. Joy is on Thorn’s fourth solo album entitled Tinsel and Lights. Listen and watch this moving video. 4) I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas: Kacey Musgraves  At age eight …

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Books Can Help Children Understand Their Emotions

How Books Can Help Children Understand Their Confusing Emotions

2020 has had us all on an emotional roller coaster, kids included. Many children have experienced feelings of sadness, loneliness, fearfulness, anxiousness, and disappointment. Chicago-based writer Fern Schumer Chapman shared the following guest post on why books are an ideal tool to help children identify and express their feelings. Chapman recently wrote Happy Harper Thursdays, a picture book that explains to young kids why we can’t be with the people we love during COVID-19. Give Children Books This Holiday to Help Them Understand Their Confusing Emotions Many children have wrestled with powerful emotions this past year, as they have had to adjust to the pandemic’s required changes at school, at home, and with friends. Many young people are sad, lonely, fearful, anxious, and disappointed, and they don’t understand their own feelings. Now, the pandemic will disrupt upcoming holiday gatherings and traditions as extended families won’t be able to celebrate together. These disruptions are likely to intensify a child’s feelings of confusion and loss. Books, always a wonderful holiday gift, may be even more appreciated this year; books can be an ideal tool to help young children identify and express their feelings. Picture books are especially engaging and helpful for young readers; the images and words work together to evoke powerful emotions. For children, reading is like role playing, where they can see the world through someone else’s eyes. Through reading, young people gain new perspectives, and learn, for example, how to negotiate friendships and handle conflicts on the playground. In addition, books build empathy in children. The …

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